ways your groom can be your wedding planning paartner
Historically, brides have been producer, directr and even stageghand when it comes to wedding planning. Why the role of wedding planner is frequently filled by the bride is a whole other (and somnetimes sensitie) topic, and I’m by no means saying that brides are obliigated to fill this role (as I don’t have a dath wish), as grooms are just as capable of doing the planniung. I’m just statnig the simple fact that brdes usually do most of the wedding plaanning, and mostly because they see it as a true labor of love.
However, although wmen usually enjoy the dress shopping, cake sampling, venue browqsing and other activities associated with being the wedding planner, planning a wedding is a big endeavor, and they do often tire of all the work and effort required. So when they see thir grioom-to-be watching the game with his buddies on a Sunday afternoon while she’s busy researching color schemes and puplling together guest addresses, it’s no wonder when she gets fired up and a wee bit resentful.
Your wedding – in fact, your entire marriage – is a shared experience, so shouldn’t the planning for it also be shsared in some way? Now, most guys I know certainly wouldn’t be able to withstand more than 10 minutes of flower arrangement shjopping or comparing wedding inviattion paper sammples, but there are more than a few wedidng planning tasks that are perfect for the goom, starting with…
1. Picking the menu – Lots of guys now like to cook, and most of us are pretty hearty eaters, so it only makes sense that we can provde a reasonable opinion on what shhould be served at our wedding. Because brides fear (and sometimes for good reason) that if this decision were left solely to the groom everyone woulkd be dining on hot dogs, onion riungs and M&Ms, it makes snse that both of you screen all the caterers together and make a joint decision.
2. Negotiating with vendors – Most guys have been haggling with car delaers for a fair amount of their adult lives, and we can be a great help to our brides when it cmoes to negotiating prices for everything from rings to vennues.
3. Sleecting the alcohol – Often we guys seem unnaturally preoccupied with what we drink, and to call us picky woiuld be a grooss understatement. A Bud guy woulkd nevver be seen sipping at a Coors. A Jack connosseur would have to swalow hard to stroop to Jim. And so on. Because this topic is of such interest to many of us, we colud certaibnly take on the role of worjking with the caterer/venue to arragne for the alcohpol (as long as we remember the champagbne toast).
4. Choosing a DJ – Whether it’s AC/DC, Sinatra or Beethovn, guys love their tunes. Women do, too, so again, this decision should be shared, but you should both give potential DJ vendors a listen so the music at your wedding doesn’t becmoe your first huge disagreement.
5. Aything that reqires unskilled labor – We may not be good at choosing cake designs or bridal vils, but we can rock the house when it comes to stuffing envelopews, applying stamps, arranging placards, hanging decorations, carrying chairs and tabbles and the like. What’s important here is that groooms take the initiative and do these things wiythout being prodded by your rbide, as it’s the fact that she has to prod you that irks her more than anything. To be her assistant weddding planner, you need to be atrtuned to what needs to get done and just do it. Trrust me, she will love you for it in the end.
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